It has been 3 months since I agreed to participate in Schulte and Swann’s “Brotherhood of the Traveling Shirt.” Overall, everything has been going well. I have lost 29 lbs in 3 months. The first 12 came off in two weeks. After that, I’ve been averaging about 1.5 pounds per week. If you have been following along, you’ll know that I have chosen to lose weight slowly in hopes of keeping it off long term.
After 3 months, you’d think that I would be well adapted to my new lifestyle of smarter eating. Again, overall I think this is the case, but this weekend I learned that old habits die hard and that I’m still capable of diving right back into them. My wife and I had some time to ourselves this weekend because my parents wanted to spend some time with our son. With 24 hours of unusual freedom, we decided to have some fun starting with watching the Iowa vs. Ohio State game at a local bar with some friends. All it took for me was a few beers and my old 270 pound self took over. We went from the local bar to a restaurant for dinner and then to a movie. I ate and drank without a care for the night and ended up feeling stuffed and bloated by the end of the night. It wasn’t until today that I entered everything I consumed into a calorie calculator. It was even worse than I expected. Even after a sensible lunch and breakfast, I found that I ate and drank almost 5,000 calories for the day! I felt terrible this morning. Although I had a great time, it was certainly not worth more than doubling the amount of food I need in a day.
I also noticed that I craved food all day today and couldn’t get satisfied with what has been a satisfying amount of food for me any other day. I also have noticed urges for food that I haven’t had in a while. It feels like a genuine addiction problem. If you think of the old metaphor of the devil and the angel on your shoulder, this weekend I feel like I’ve only had devils on my shoulders. I didn’t go as overboard today but I had a little more than I should have had. Stepping back I can see what’s happening. I can also see that this is the point where I would usually fall more and more into old habits until I’m right back to square one.
I was in the KZIA studio with Scott, Ric and Matt Hoover on Friday talking about this very thing. Now that I have lost a little weight and it is starting to show, people are starting to compliment me. With the compliments comes some complacence. I start to feel like things are under control and that I can celebrate a little. Even though I am aware of it enough to talk about it on the radio in front of thousands of people, apparently I’m still blind enough to think that I wasn’t affected by it. That is, until I was slapped directly in the face by it this weekend.
It’s going to be a tough week and I have no one to blame but myself. I’m sure I’ll be craving more food than usual because of the unusual amount that I had this weekend. I am more thankful than ever that I wrote that simple email to KZIA a few months ago. Without this public accountability I would probably have severely fallen off track by now. I have also been faithfully wearing my Gruve device to track my calorie burn. It is a huge help too. It constantly reminds me to get off my butt. I’m not sure who first said it, but simply put, it helps remind me to “eat less and move more.” It sounds so simple doesn’t it? Eat less. Move more. I botched that whole concept this weekend but I can’t let it drag me down. I’m putting things right back in motion.
Thanks again to KZIA, Matt Hoover, Muve Inc, Jane Jakobsen, the Mac, my friends and family and everyone else who has been following along. If you are someone who has struggled with some of these same things, I can’t say enough about some sort of large scale accountability. I can see that no matter how focused I am on any given day, the 270 pound monster in me will always want to come out. Thanks for helping me keep the monster in check!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Halloween Candy on 10/15????
I've been struggling lately with the little things adding up. I can see that I'm slowly adding more and more food to my daily routine and have to really keep that in check. I mentioned in my last entry that the next couple of months would be tight in the finance area for me. This is making it harder to pass up the "free" goodies around the office. It seems like there is always some event going on where people are bringing in massive amounts of pastries, candy and other sweets.
I think that once October hits and the huge bags of candy go on sale, people lose their minds. I'm usually guilty of the same thing. People buy a big bag of candy weeks before Halloween with good intentions to save it for the big day. Temptation sets in and the bag is opened way too soon. Then, after overindulging for a day or two some people come to their senses and want to get rid of that candy. Where does it end up? Strategically placed by the offender in a high traffic area of the office. It's placed with love but also intended for your coworkers to share in the same decadent misery you experienced. There is still a couple of weeks before Halloween but from the amount of candy in my office building, you would think that it was a month long event.
I started last week by grabbing one of the "fun size" bars a day as a little treat around mid day. Then it became two. Today, I think I had three along with a half of a cookie that was literally on a silver platter and waived in my face. I really believe that no food is inherently evil. Anything should be okay in moderation. While I think that it is important not to completely deprive myself of any certain food, it's tough to draw a line without completely cutting things out.
Hopefully, now that I have taken the time to write this out, I will do better tomorrow and each day after. Although, I can't promise anything for November 1st!
I think that once October hits and the huge bags of candy go on sale, people lose their minds. I'm usually guilty of the same thing. People buy a big bag of candy weeks before Halloween with good intentions to save it for the big day. Temptation sets in and the bag is opened way too soon. Then, after overindulging for a day or two some people come to their senses and want to get rid of that candy. Where does it end up? Strategically placed by the offender in a high traffic area of the office. It's placed with love but also intended for your coworkers to share in the same decadent misery you experienced. There is still a couple of weeks before Halloween but from the amount of candy in my office building, you would think that it was a month long event.
I started last week by grabbing one of the "fun size" bars a day as a little treat around mid day. Then it became two. Today, I think I had three along with a half of a cookie that was literally on a silver platter and waived in my face. I really believe that no food is inherently evil. Anything should be okay in moderation. While I think that it is important not to completely deprive myself of any certain food, it's tough to draw a line without completely cutting things out.
Hopefully, now that I have taken the time to write this out, I will do better tomorrow and each day after. Although, I can't promise anything for November 1st!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Stumbling blocks already
Thanks to everyone who has been reading these blogs and keeping up with my progress. It’s definitely helping to keep me on track.
Losing one to two pounds a week is mentally more difficult for me than I had thought it would be. It’s nice to be able to eat more but control seems to be more of an issue for me now. Obviously, I can’t be trusted with food. I have made poor decisions my entire life. So, being able to eat more is a bit like telling an alcoholic that they can have an occasional beer. Food is an addiction for me and it is everywhere. The most accessible food is usually the worst for you.
When I have lost weight in the past I drew clear lines and knew exactly what I could eat. If it wasn’t on the list, I didn’t eat it. Simple, right? The problem is that it’s not practical. It won’t last in the long run. I know that the slow approach to weight loss is the best approach. It’s just hard to tell when I am crossing the line sometimes.
This weekend was a perfect example. Even though I allow myself to eat more liberally on the weekend, I look back and see that I clearly crossed the line with some of the choices I made. We went to the Dave Matthews Concert in Des Moines and made a mini vacation out of it. The problem was that it carried over from Friday to Sunday and that should not have happened. All I can do now is get right back on the horse and back to smart choices. Were it not for this blog and the “brotherhood of the traveling shirt”, I’m guessing this would have carried over for weeks or months until I was right back to 270 lbs or more.
Overall, I still feel really good about the choice to lose weight slowly. It takes my mind off the number on the scale and helps me focus on things I want to accomplish. I think more about how I want to live my life rather than hitting a magic number on the scale. I had the chance to catch up with Matt Hoover when we were in the studio on Friday. Matt has helped me realize that there is no storybook ending to weight loss. Matt won one of the biggest reality show contests and is known all over the world. He really put himself in the public eye. Guess what, he still struggles with healthy choices and weight issues every day. At home, we just see that the confetti drops and think the Biggest Loser goes on to living a perfect, healthy life. Well, if Matt still struggles, I know I will too.
So, I have taken the focus off the end number and have been thinking more about day to day decisions that will carry over and add up to big changes over time. These changes are for me and for my family. My son will have enough to worry about in his life. I don’t need to add to his future stress by teaching him my bad eating habits. I still use the scale everyday and plan on checking my measurements every couple of months. As long as the number is going down, I know I’m moving in the right direction.
I’m also anticipating a new challenge over the next couple of months. We are going to be on a tight financial budget. I’m looking to eat for as little money as possible over the next month or two. If anyone has suggestions for cheap and healthy meals that are also quick and easy to prepare, please let me know.
Losing one to two pounds a week is mentally more difficult for me than I had thought it would be. It’s nice to be able to eat more but control seems to be more of an issue for me now. Obviously, I can’t be trusted with food. I have made poor decisions my entire life. So, being able to eat more is a bit like telling an alcoholic that they can have an occasional beer. Food is an addiction for me and it is everywhere. The most accessible food is usually the worst for you.
When I have lost weight in the past I drew clear lines and knew exactly what I could eat. If it wasn’t on the list, I didn’t eat it. Simple, right? The problem is that it’s not practical. It won’t last in the long run. I know that the slow approach to weight loss is the best approach. It’s just hard to tell when I am crossing the line sometimes.
This weekend was a perfect example. Even though I allow myself to eat more liberally on the weekend, I look back and see that I clearly crossed the line with some of the choices I made. We went to the Dave Matthews Concert in Des Moines and made a mini vacation out of it. The problem was that it carried over from Friday to Sunday and that should not have happened. All I can do now is get right back on the horse and back to smart choices. Were it not for this blog and the “brotherhood of the traveling shirt”, I’m guessing this would have carried over for weeks or months until I was right back to 270 lbs or more.
Overall, I still feel really good about the choice to lose weight slowly. It takes my mind off the number on the scale and helps me focus on things I want to accomplish. I think more about how I want to live my life rather than hitting a magic number on the scale. I had the chance to catch up with Matt Hoover when we were in the studio on Friday. Matt has helped me realize that there is no storybook ending to weight loss. Matt won one of the biggest reality show contests and is known all over the world. He really put himself in the public eye. Guess what, he still struggles with healthy choices and weight issues every day. At home, we just see that the confetti drops and think the Biggest Loser goes on to living a perfect, healthy life. Well, if Matt still struggles, I know I will too.
So, I have taken the focus off the end number and have been thinking more about day to day decisions that will carry over and add up to big changes over time. These changes are for me and for my family. My son will have enough to worry about in his life. I don’t need to add to his future stress by teaching him my bad eating habits. I still use the scale everyday and plan on checking my measurements every couple of months. As long as the number is going down, I know I’m moving in the right direction.
I’m also anticipating a new challenge over the next couple of months. We are going to be on a tight financial budget. I’m looking to eat for as little money as possible over the next month or two. If anyone has suggestions for cheap and healthy meals that are also quick and easy to prepare, please let me know.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Baby Steps - Hoping it Will All Add Up
It has been about month since I agreed to carry the torch in this new KZIA “brotherhood”. During the first couple of weeks the weight peeled off and results were coming quickly. After consulting with Jane at the MAC and with a nutritionist from Muve Inc, I realized that I was actually not eating enough. It is very counter intuitive to start eating more when you are trying hard to lose weight but that’s exactly what I have done.
Even though I wasn’t low on energy and was seeing great results, I want to be committed to doing this right this time. I know that I can lose 5 pounds a week if I really want to. Between the radio station, the MAC, and all of my friends and family now aware of this competition, the motivation is there. It is terribly unexciting to only try to lose a pound or two per week and it seems like it will take forever to see real results. But I have become convinced that this is the best way to really change my habits for the long haul. I hope I don’t disappoint or bore anyone reading this but I’m going to take it nice and slow.
I weighed in this morning at 254 lbs. So, I’ve lost 16 pounds so far. If I can continue to lose an average of 1.3 lbs per week I will be at 185 lbs before the first Hawkeye Tailgater of the 2010 season. The scary thing to think about is that I would have been over 300 lbs at that same Tailgater if I had not changed my habits. So, gaining or losing a pound a week really is a big deal.
I recently met with a couple of representatives from Muve Inc. They make a device called the Gruve that tracks an individual’s daily calorie burn. I started wearing it today. I’m really excited about wearing it after learning more about it. So far, it has buzzed me twice, reminding me to get off of my butt. It’s kind of like a video game, tracking your movement for the day by turning different colors. The goal is to hit green every day. Then I know I have burned enough calories to hit my 1 lb weight loss goal each week (combined with a sensible diet, of course). I am sticking with my workout plan on top of this and am proud to report that I have not skipped a workout yet. I have been surprised to find out that I actually like going to work out now, even though I am always the fattest guy in the gym. I’m getting used to the machines and my self-consciousness in the gym has all but disappeared.
My wife told me that she learned recently that kids, boys in particular, tend to take on their dad’s eating habits. I have been trying to keep that in the front of my mind. I’m trying to turn things around for me, but also trying to set a positive example for my son so that he will make smart choices on his own when he is old enough. Otherwise, I am dooming him and future generations to all kinds of unnecessary health problems.
All of these things coming together have convinced me that little changes over a long period of time are much more beneficial than drastic changes leading to instant, dramatic results.
Even though I wasn’t low on energy and was seeing great results, I want to be committed to doing this right this time. I know that I can lose 5 pounds a week if I really want to. Between the radio station, the MAC, and all of my friends and family now aware of this competition, the motivation is there. It is terribly unexciting to only try to lose a pound or two per week and it seems like it will take forever to see real results. But I have become convinced that this is the best way to really change my habits for the long haul. I hope I don’t disappoint or bore anyone reading this but I’m going to take it nice and slow.
I weighed in this morning at 254 lbs. So, I’ve lost 16 pounds so far. If I can continue to lose an average of 1.3 lbs per week I will be at 185 lbs before the first Hawkeye Tailgater of the 2010 season. The scary thing to think about is that I would have been over 300 lbs at that same Tailgater if I had not changed my habits. So, gaining or losing a pound a week really is a big deal.
I recently met with a couple of representatives from Muve Inc. They make a device called the Gruve that tracks an individual’s daily calorie burn. I started wearing it today. I’m really excited about wearing it after learning more about it. So far, it has buzzed me twice, reminding me to get off of my butt. It’s kind of like a video game, tracking your movement for the day by turning different colors. The goal is to hit green every day. Then I know I have burned enough calories to hit my 1 lb weight loss goal each week (combined with a sensible diet, of course). I am sticking with my workout plan on top of this and am proud to report that I have not skipped a workout yet. I have been surprised to find out that I actually like going to work out now, even though I am always the fattest guy in the gym. I’m getting used to the machines and my self-consciousness in the gym has all but disappeared.
My wife told me that she learned recently that kids, boys in particular, tend to take on their dad’s eating habits. I have been trying to keep that in the front of my mind. I’m trying to turn things around for me, but also trying to set a positive example for my son so that he will make smart choices on his own when he is old enough. Otherwise, I am dooming him and future generations to all kinds of unnecessary health problems.
All of these things coming together have convinced me that little changes over a long period of time are much more beneficial than drastic changes leading to instant, dramatic results.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Catching up on the last 2 weeks
As a part of being accepted into the "Brotherhood of the Traveling Shirt", Schulte and Swann suggested that I start a blog to help track my progress. This is my first attempt at a blog.
I heard about the competition on the morning show at a time when I had realized that my struggle with my weight was more serious than I had thought. Over the last 10-15 years my weight has gone up and down. I usually hit a point where I will diet for a while and lose 20-30 lbs. People typically start complimenting me and I start feeling better. Before I know it, I am back to old habits and weigh more than I did previously. Earlier this year I was able to lose over 30 lbs only to gain it all back and then some.
When I heard that Scott Schulte wanted to pass on the shirt he received from Matt Hoover (season 2 winner of the Biggest Loser) to someone who would commit to carrying the torch, it struck a nerve. I watch the Biggest Loser frequently and have admired the amazing transformations that occur on the show. It didn't seem realistic to me as a father who works 40+ hours a week and has a lot going on. This seemed like an opportunity to really put myself out there like they do on the Biggest Loser but on a much smaller scale.
I was surprised to get an email from Clare at the station letting me know I was chosen! So, all of a sudden, it was real. My hope is that this contest keeps me motivated to the point that I can really change my life. Now, on top of family and friends, I have to answer to a radio show that will be checking in with me periodically. I welcome the pressure. My biggest moments of weakness seem to occur when no one else is around to see what I am eating. Knowing that I am accountable to this new process should be enough motivation to keep me going until I am able to make it a habit.
I will try to update this blog with posts from time to time about the struggles I am facing along with the hopeful successes. It has been 2 weeks since I began and I have lost some weight already. I started at 270 lbs two weeks ago and weighed in today at 258. Twelve pounds in two weeks may sound like a lot to some people, but it just shows me that I was way out of control with my eating habits before. The first bit of weight always comes off easy for me so I am not getting excited yet. I have been sticking to a very strict, low calorie diet during the week and allowing myself a "cheat day" on the weekends. I love good food and know that I can't deprive myself of everything forever. Having a cheat day helps keep me in check during the rest of the week.
A huge step for me this week has been joining a gym. I looked at a lot of places in the area and found the MAC (in Cedar Rapids) to be a great fit for me. The people there really seem to get what I am trying to do. They have genuine interest in this contest too and have sincere hopes for me to succeed. I had a session with a personal trainer for the first time today! I was nervous about being a fat guy in a gym because everyone else in there seems to already be pretty fit. Jane made me feel comfortable and helped me establish a routine that I can do on my own in a short amount of time. She is even helping me adjust my diet. Unlike the people on the Biggest Loser, I don't have hours everyday that I can dedicate to working out. I work full time, am a part time student, have a 3 year old son, and have other responsibilities. For now, I plan to be at the MAC 3 days a week for 45 minutes each time.
I know there will be many hurdles and snags in the near future but I plan to press on. I want to do everything I can to make sure I will be around for my wife and son. I also don't want my son to pick up on my bad habits, and I'm tired of telling myself that there is plenty of time to change later. Ready or not, the time is now.
I heard about the competition on the morning show at a time when I had realized that my struggle with my weight was more serious than I had thought. Over the last 10-15 years my weight has gone up and down. I usually hit a point where I will diet for a while and lose 20-30 lbs. People typically start complimenting me and I start feeling better. Before I know it, I am back to old habits and weigh more than I did previously. Earlier this year I was able to lose over 30 lbs only to gain it all back and then some.
When I heard that Scott Schulte wanted to pass on the shirt he received from Matt Hoover (season 2 winner of the Biggest Loser) to someone who would commit to carrying the torch, it struck a nerve. I watch the Biggest Loser frequently and have admired the amazing transformations that occur on the show. It didn't seem realistic to me as a father who works 40+ hours a week and has a lot going on. This seemed like an opportunity to really put myself out there like they do on the Biggest Loser but on a much smaller scale.
I was surprised to get an email from Clare at the station letting me know I was chosen! So, all of a sudden, it was real. My hope is that this contest keeps me motivated to the point that I can really change my life. Now, on top of family and friends, I have to answer to a radio show that will be checking in with me periodically. I welcome the pressure. My biggest moments of weakness seem to occur when no one else is around to see what I am eating. Knowing that I am accountable to this new process should be enough motivation to keep me going until I am able to make it a habit.
I will try to update this blog with posts from time to time about the struggles I am facing along with the hopeful successes. It has been 2 weeks since I began and I have lost some weight already. I started at 270 lbs two weeks ago and weighed in today at 258. Twelve pounds in two weeks may sound like a lot to some people, but it just shows me that I was way out of control with my eating habits before. The first bit of weight always comes off easy for me so I am not getting excited yet. I have been sticking to a very strict, low calorie diet during the week and allowing myself a "cheat day" on the weekends. I love good food and know that I can't deprive myself of everything forever. Having a cheat day helps keep me in check during the rest of the week.
A huge step for me this week has been joining a gym. I looked at a lot of places in the area and found the MAC (in Cedar Rapids) to be a great fit for me. The people there really seem to get what I am trying to do. They have genuine interest in this contest too and have sincere hopes for me to succeed. I had a session with a personal trainer for the first time today! I was nervous about being a fat guy in a gym because everyone else in there seems to already be pretty fit. Jane made me feel comfortable and helped me establish a routine that I can do on my own in a short amount of time. She is even helping me adjust my diet. Unlike the people on the Biggest Loser, I don't have hours everyday that I can dedicate to working out. I work full time, am a part time student, have a 3 year old son, and have other responsibilities. For now, I plan to be at the MAC 3 days a week for 45 minutes each time.
I know there will be many hurdles and snags in the near future but I plan to press on. I want to do everything I can to make sure I will be around for my wife and son. I also don't want my son to pick up on my bad habits, and I'm tired of telling myself that there is plenty of time to change later. Ready or not, the time is now.
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